Something to Talk About (Ryan & Lindsay Discuss BRIEF ENCOUNTER)

Here’s the cool thing about marrying a movie geek – it leads to a lot of great conversations about the movies you watch. On Sunday evening, Lindsay and I watched David Lean’s BRIEF ENCOUNTER for the first time. We both dug it, but we differed on our reaction to Laura and Alec’s affair….

Lindsay : I didn’t love it.

Ryan: Why didn’t you love it?

Lindsay : It was frustrating watching it because it felt like the movie was trying to be a romance. But they were romanticizing adultary which I just don’t find romantic, especially since she didn’t have anything like a mean, abusive husband. It just seemed like we were supposed to take it as a romance when really it was a douche and another douche cheating on their spouses.

Ryan: But they couldn’t help it, they each found somebody who they connected with.

Lindsay : Yeah, that’s awesome – except that they both already found the person who they said ‘I do’ to, and all bets are off at that point.

Ryan: True, but stuff like this happens

Lindsay : Oh we are so headed for divorce if that’s your opinion.

Ryan: I mean to say that the whole thing is sadly romantic.

Lindsay : That’s the problem is that I didn’t even find it romantic in a sad way.

Ryan: Not even in a Romeo & Juliet –

Lindsay : Oh no, no, no you can not compare the two. Romeo and Juliet were two children who had pure love, and the reason that they couldn’t be together was because of the hatred between their families. Totally different. These are two people who already fell in love, and they would hurt the shit out of both their spouses.

Ryan: Yeah, well that’s where the sad part comes on.

Lindsay : No! The sad part is that they’re assholes. Especially because they weren’t even really in love, she was just bored.

Ryan: I don’t think so, I think they felt an actual connection to one another, and that’s why this thing flared up so quickly and truly for them.

Lindsay : But that’s not love. It’s easy to think you’re in love with someone you see for five hours at a rate of about an hour a week for four weeks running.

Ryan: You think it’s infatuation?

Lindsay : Yeah. You love someone when you come home and their dirty socks are on the floor and they have bad breath.

Ryan: Is that why you love me?

Lindsay : Yeah.

Ryan: Wow.

Lindsay : I love you in spite of those things. You know, it’s great when we go out on a date and spend a great day together – that’s friggin’ awesome. But I still love you at night when you don’t do the dishes. That’s love. having a couple good dates with a person isn’t love because you’re only seeing them with their game face on.

Ryan: But I don’t think they had their game face on. I think it was just this happenstance where they met each other, and learned who each other was – maybe not the dirty socks side – but they saw this entity, and fell for it.

Lindsay : She was a bored housewife who got out of the house once a week. And in that time she had to herself, she happened to meet a man who showed her a good time.

Ryan: Good time? He bought her soup! You didn’t even find yourself drawn to the story in a sad way? You know, as in here are these two people who are in a situation that is clearly very bad for them, they’re setting themselves up to get immensely hurt and hurt the people around them?

Lindsay : When he said “I have to say it – I love you”, all I was thinking was “You fuckin’ douchebag”. I was sad for everybody else, but not for them. They were two selfish people who decided to have a bit of fun with each other and ignore the fact that there were children at home. Like what was gonna happen?

Ryan: I don’t think they thought that far ahead

Lindsay : Right. And that’s selfish.

Ryan: Well she admitted that she was feeling guilty

Lindsay  (mockingly): Oh, I feel guilty! I’m still gonna do it, I’m just gonna feel guilty about it.

Ryan: i guess to me, it just didn’t seem like the same sort of Ashley Madison, two cheating adults affair. It seemed to be more of two people who shared a genuine connection.

Lindsay : But to me, that’s a worse type of adultery than if they’d just gone and shacked up. To have an emotional affair is way worse. that’s the worst way to cheat on someone you’ve committed your life to.

Ryan: So you didn’t like the movie?

Lindsay : It’s not that I didn’t like the movie, it’s that you’re asking me if I thought it was romantic. I’m saying that it was a good movie about two idiots who decided to forsake their families. It’s not a tragedy in the way that Romeo & Juliet is a tragedy. You comparing it to Romeo & Juliet however…that’s a tragedy.