Ryan McNeil
I’m a believer in signs.
When the opening moments of a film features a church bell tolling, followed by the line “Good luck, Maestro”…that isn’t a good sign.
NINE is the story of Italian film director Guido Contini (Daniel Day Lewis). We begin as he commences filming his latest movie, the grandly titled ITALIA. It is to star Claudia Jenssen (Nicole Kidman) and begin filming in ten days. What’s it about? Maestro’s not so sure. You see, he hasn’t finished the script yet…matter of fact, he hasn’t even started!
As he struggles to turn cinematic water into wine, we are slowly introduced to the various women who have gotten him this far…
There’s his ingenue wife, Luisa (Marion Cotillard)
His fiery mistress, Carla (Penelope Cruz)
His costume designer, Lili la Fleur (Judi Dench)
The prostitute who opened his eyes as a child, Saraghina (Fergie)
The fashion writer who adores his work, Stephanie (Kate Hudson)
The aforementioned diva who he directs to greatness, Caludia (Kidman)
and of course, his mother (Sophia Loren).
One by one they interact with Guido, some face to face, some in memory. Some day in and day out, some only in fleeting moments. And while song after song chants his name in the lyrics (literally), maestro can’t seem to tap into that part of the dolce vita that has brought him such success.
His project is ready to crumble, his sanity and physical health is fading, his marriage in in worlds of trouble, and nobody seems to be able to offer him the right bit of guidance. Not his wife, not his doctor, not his mistress, not even his priest.
For me, more than anything else NINE is a mess. It seems like it may well be an enjoyable musical, if not a particularly memorable one. It certainly isn’t a musical that needed to be adapted into a feature film. Why? Let me spell this out…
This is a film based on the musical based on the autobiographical film of a man trying to make a film!
I truly believe that Rob Marshall did as good a job in adapting this show to the screen as anybody possibly could, but therin lies the rub – the adaptation still isn’t good enough. Part of the problem is that Marshall tries to employ the same trick he used in CHICAGO. he wants to make the musical numbers extensions of the lead character’s imagination. That’s a great trick once Rob, but there’s no way I’ll go for it twice.
NINE comes off like a series of disjointed moments, with flashes of brilliance that disappear far too quickly. It suffers from underachievement in acting, style over substance, and worst of all for a musical – mediocre singing. Seriously folks, while she knocked her number out of the park, you’ve seriously miscalculated if Fergie is your best singer on board.
Strangely, for a film that features prominent roles for seven different women, none of the roles seem to carry any sort of weight. I’m not suggesting any of them be able to go toe-to-toe with Daniel Day-Lewis, but at least one of the seven should be able to make her part matter a bit more than it does. Nay, every single one of them breeze in and out without making much of a dramatic dent. Lordy – where’s Uma Thurman speaking Sweedish when you need her?
So if the ladies can’t save the film, what about the maestro himself? Strange as it is for me to say this, I feel let down by Daniel Day-Lewis. He begins with such promise, delivering an opening monologue full of delicacy and love about the magic of filmmaking…then he calls it a day. Not only is his Italian accent bad, but it gets a whole lot worse when he starts singing (which sucks, given that he’s one of the few characters who get two turns at the mic). At first he reminded me of my bad impression of my Italian father-in-law. However, as the film went on, i realized I had it wrong. He wasn’t doing my bad impression of my father-in-law…he was doing a bad impression of my bad impression of my father in law!
It seems as though from the very beginning, much like the events that unfold within the story, this movie fell victim to believing in its own legend. The fact is that only one song from this film really stands on its own. To give the other nine character numbers any sort of fighting chance, the cast should have been filled out with broadway virtuosos. Instead, the legend of NINE demanded that only famous film actresses would do, and thus the film was doomed.
Believe in cinematic signs of fate. Toll the bell and strike the set – NINE is only a four and a half. At best.
"Lordy – where's Uma Thurman speaking Sweedish when you need her?" – that's all I really needed to read.
I may catch this on DVD or HBO, but my desire for it has all faded.
Shucks. Well, I'm probably going to like this much. But it's unfortunate that you really don't like it. Did you like Sweeney Todd, because I know the singing was "weak" in that too.
Great minds think alike today. I was soooo disappointed in this one! I walked out feeling kind of embarrassed for having wanted to see it at all.
I agree with pretty much everything you said, however I do think that Marion Cotillard managed to make something of her role and I thought the scenes between her and Daniel Day-Lewis were pretty well done.
@ Univarn… Glad I could help. It's not quite bad enough to say "I saw it so you don't have to"…but it's close!
@ Andrew… Strangely enough, I loved SWEENEY. Perhaps because while the singing isn't top notch it all has character…or perhaps because there was so much else going on visually. If you're curious, I was indeed blogging back when SWEENEY came out, here's my review:
http://mcneilmatinee.blogspot.com/2008/04/review-sweeney-todd-12.html
@ Norma… Great minds indeed! Pity, since I just re-watched the trailer last night and was reminded how great this baby looked going in.
Oh well…bring on SPRING AWAKENING!
Whoa. I was on the fence about whether to see this or not, now I don't think I will. Haven't read one positive review of this. I think I'll pass…
Wow, you really didn't like this movie! I thought Marion Cotilliard really managed to stand out. And I am not a musician but couldn't find much wrong with the singing. I didn't care much for Nicole Kidmans and Kate Hudons songs but everything else seemed fine to me. I especially like Fergie's song (although I don't know her music as a singer).
Well, it doesn't happen often that we disagree so fully on a film…it was bound to happen at some point 😉
Okay, Mad Hatter. I will console myself with the Sweeney Todd review 🙂
@ Tom… Skip it. Wait until DVD if your curiosity can't hold out.
@ Vanessa… It's not that the singing is especially bad, it just isn't particularly good. Musicals have worried themselves so completely with bringing in nothing but the most famous faces, nobody takes a moment to figure out if their voice really holds up.
Glad you dug it (means it wasn't a total loss), and btw – Fergie's does the female vocals in the Black Eyed Peas.
@ Andrew… Console away!
I came to this film expecting nothing. As I mentioned I my review, I am not a fan of musicals, I hated Chicago and as a fan of 8 ½ I would rather they left it alone. Even with all that baggage I enjoyed it. Don’t get me wrong I didn’t love it and it isn’t in my top ten of the year (I think it is forty something!) but I didn’t hate it.
Very disappointing. I had high expectations for this one 🙁 I'll wait for da DVD
@ Fandango/Number Six… I am indeed taking the piss out of NINE, but I can't say I hated it. It's a mess, but it's not a flop. It has flashes of greatness…but for me they were just that – flashes. I guess, my ultimate reaction is that it could have been better with a bit more finesse.
@ Castor… Indeed – you might dig it, but I can't say that it's worth a $12 ticket.
Wow, I had no desire to see this film before. And now, after reading this, I have…less than that. What's less than none? Negative. I have negative desire.
– Suzie McQ
I'm with Anon.
@ Suzie… Usually I try to dispell negativity…but not in the case of this flick. Neg away good buddy, neg away.
@ Tom… I think when I see Suzie next on Monday, I'll start calling her "Anon".
LOL
I will see you…Anon…
Could take on a whole new meaning!
😉
-Suz-Anon
Love the lead. It says everything about the movie, which is sad because of all the buzz surrounding it. I suppose not everything can live up to the hype, and you may have convinced me to hold out for Netflix on this one even though I like Daniel Day Lewis and love Penelope Cruz and Marion Cotillard.
@ M. Carter… Hollywood is quickly approaching a tipping point where musicals are concerned. They are so anxious to fill them with familiar names that they have stopped caring how much musical talent these names have.
A pity really, since a little bit of recasting could have pushed this picture towards being something really special.
I just got around to seeing this, despite your and other mediocre reviews. I was too curious! Your review pretty much echoes my own feelings- it's not the worst thing ever, but it really is lackluster in the story and singing department. Looked great, though.
I long for a day when truly great musicals are made again, and not just once every few years. It's becoming a lost art.
@ Alex… Yeah, it's not my favorite, but it isn't the sort of movie I'd call "Avoid-It-Bad".
I'm with you on wanting good musicals. I think in order to achieve that, Hollywood has to be unafraid to forego A-List names for actors who have stage presence. (For what it's worth, I'm hoping they don't muck up SPRING AWAKENING).