Once in a while someone will ask me what I find so appealing about spending ten solid days soaking up documentaries. There are many answers of course, but the one I come back to most often is the habit of finding something I’ve never seen before…and might never see again. Something a little nutty, but executed so well that it elevates itself into something wondrous.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I point you towards Exhibit A, a new film from Jonah Bekhor and Zach Math: THE FINAL MEMBER.

This documentary is about The Icelandic Phallogical Museum…a massive collection of male organs from all manner of species. From the mighty sperm whale to the microscopic gerbil. They are all the proud possessions of curator Sigurdur Hjartarson. He has every sort of penis you could think of, except one: a human’s. Thus, his museum is incomplete.

But there is hope! An elderly Icelandic man – an aging playboy named Mr. Arason – agreed to donate his manly bits when he dies. Adding an extra ray of sunshine to Sigurdur’s ambitions is an American named Tom who also offers to donate his male anatomy. What’s more, Tom ups the stakes by offering to hand his over before he dies. All three men are a bit eccentric (one penis short of a full exhibit?), and watching them interact on this project is nothing short of genius.

What’s most entertaining about a film like THE FINAL MEMBER isn’t the story itself. Anyone capable of typing “Google.com” can learn about this sort of believe-it-or-not tale. What’s most entertaining is getting to know these three men, and continue to be dazzled by their eccentricities. The film goes to great lengths to play up Tom’s somewhat exhibitionist desires, Mr. Arason’s worry over being usurped by a foreigner and the physical state of his 90-year-old manhood, and Sigurdur’s exasperation at all of it.

Such structure is what helps THE FINAL MEMBER stay clever and avoid becoming crude. Let’s face facts, the film is one wall-to-wall dick conversation, and it could have been very easy to start having fun at these people’s expense. Instead, by taking an approach that is equal parts whimsical and sad, the film allows us to feel something for these men and their individual quest. It brings hope, sadness, warmth and pity into what could otherwise be one long inappropriate conversation.

This is why I come to a documentary film festival, since I don’t know where else I would have discovered such a charming ode to an elusive Johnson. The movie contains one glorious moment after the other, most of which I dare not spoil just in case you ever track it down.

The hitch about documentary films is that once a story is told, it’s difficult to ever retell it. Thus, the onus is on that first documentarian to tell it right, otherwise the whole subject is spoiled. THE FINAL MEMBER might be the best documentary subject I’ve ever heard of: I’m happy to report that it has told its story well.

THE FINAL MEMBER plays Today – 9:45pm at The Royal, again on Thursday May 3rd – 9:00pm at The Cumberland, and once more on Sunday May 6th – 7pm at The Revue.